Saturday, October 26, 2013
Can You Tell me How to Get to the Benny Hill Museum?
Virgin Atlantic
5758 W Century Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90045
(310) 215-4345
I decided to visit England a little while ago. I had always been a great admirer of Benny Hill, the most influential Brit of the 20th Century, and I got a good deal on my ticket. The English people seemed pretty friendly. It is too bad that their government consents to being our pet poodle. When I got to London, I dedided to take a little trip over to Brixton. It seemed remarkably similar to one of our own marginalized areas, but I felt safer walking around because fewer people and their mothers carry firearms. I decided to buy some weed, but did not have any references. I asked a friendly bloke, and he told me to head up this street until I reached a pub named "The Plug", at which point I was to make a right and continue walking until I reached the Green Leaf Cafe. He told me to go in and order a Coke from the black geezer inside, and they would know what I came in for. I followed the directions, and arrived at the cafe and ordered the beverage like the guy told me. The guy opened a kettle on the counter, and showed me the merchandise. It was a little steep for 20 fucking quid, but when in Rome.
I got to visit the British Museum, and wound up taking three days there alone. The other museums that I visited, such as the National Portrait Gallery and the Tate Modern were awesome as well. I also visited the Tower of London, and Buckingham Palace. That Royal Family is ugly as fuck. If I had all that princely money, I would buy a new face and new hair color. I have no idea what the obsession with these inbred fucks is all about, but it was interesting to see the palace and crown jewels.
I thought the cost of food in London was highway robbery. The best deal that you are going to find on food is at the Kensington Farmer's Market. You can get a big sandwich for 2 pounds. Shawerma in Notting Hill is awesome too.
As to Virgin Atlantic, all I can say is that I took a smorgasborg of pills before I got on the plane, when I woke up mid-flight, and the balance when I arrived at Heathrow. I have no idea what transpired while we were flying across the pond. But it must have been okay, becuase they were not waiting for me with handcuffs at the terminal.
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