Friday, July 5, 2013

Eat Your Salad

< class="separator" My narcissistic aunt is a cunt and my uncle is her brainless henchman. Due to the terms and conditions of a legal settlement, I am forbidden from using their real names. My Uncle "Wally" never worked and kept house while my aunt taught in an elementary school. From a very young age, I would dread Uncle Wally and his bad temper, red beard, and halitosis. He was unpredictable and prone to fly into a violent rage at any given moment over any trivial thing and beat the shit out of my cousins. He would hit them with a closed fist, belt buckles, tools, and lumber. One time he punched my cousin resulting in a ruptured eardrum because he inserted comical words about a monkey into the song Happy Birthday. Another time, he beat another one of my cousins half to death because he did not eat his salad. A third cousin was beaten senseless with a closed fist because he could not remember the name of a power station in El Segundo. These days, my uncle and aunt would have been involved with the Dependency Court and my cousins placed in foster care. My aunt would have been banned for life from working with children. I hope they are both dead. The reason why I bring up my dim witted abusive uncle is the part about the salad. Not beating your kids because they did not eat theirs, but how to make a nutritious, delicious salad with a great flavorful dressing and five (5) vegetables. Even though my uncle was a bastard, he made a great salad. I kind of modified it a little, but not by much. My wife, daughter and I eat this salad on a daily basis. It is a real life changer. 3/4 Head of green cabbage washed and sliced as thin as possible 1 raw medium beet, grated 1/2 white onion cut into thin julienne slices 1/2 red bell pepper cut into thin strips 1/2 bunch of parsley finely chopped, washed and wrung dry in a towel dressing smash 2 cloves of garlic in 1 tsp of salt add 1/2 cup of red wine vinegar 1 tbsb of dijon mustard fresh black pepper whisk in 3/4 cup of olive oil mix well serve the same day You can eat this with a little steamed asparagus, and some fresh fish. I cooked halibut tonight.