The oppressive heat is no excuse to weasel your way out of exercising!

Get on the trail and stop making excuses. Drink plenty of water, and eat a couple of bananas. Take at least an additional liter of water per person. Today, I decided to tackle Griffith Park from the Western end of Ferndell. Just walk a couple of hundred yards past the kid's playground and keep to the left. There are several ways to speed this section up the best was is to just start running slowly and bear right past the sycamores to a little trail that will take you straight up the ridge and finish up at those picnic tables just below the road. Cross the street, and head up the hill and soon you will be at the bridge. Keep on going up, breathe through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Keep hydrated. Take a look at the panoramic views and the inevitable pair of raven soaring overhead.

Once you get to the top take a look around and start heading down at once Pick up the pace a little bit and scan the trail ten feet in front of you. Let gravity carry you down the hill, and do not stop. Breathe and keep hydrated. Run at 3/4 speed until you get to the picnic area. Stretch for at least 15 minutes before heading to your car. Face it, it must have taken you a couple of years to get into bad shape, and it will probably take you at least a year to start seeing good results. You have to eat whole foods also! Working out alone is not enough. It is a lot of work. If you want to keep fit, you are going to need to do this run at least five days a week pushing yourself each and every time. You can go in the morning, or in the evening, it does not matter as long as you do it. It does not get easier, ever. Park your car across Los Feliz Blvd. so you don't get a parking ticket, and so that you don't cut any corners like a cheating bastard. There is another way to get a really good workout and that is by going up the steep hill to the right of the ever popular fire road leading up to the Observatory out of Ferndell. Run up this hill if you want to work your body the fuck out and fill each and every cell in your body with rich oxygen and nutrients. When you get to the top of the first steep hill, run like hell down the slope until you can barely take it anymore. Try to make yourself run up the next hill. Then the next one. And so on. After running this trail every day, I feel like 98% of my problems have been solved. I feel great, and look 10 years younger. Trail running even makes my hair grow back in a lush and shiny manner. I suspect that you will probably get the same results. I did it, and you can, too!

Mt. Lowe

Before the Station Fire, Mt. Lowe was one of the most beautiful areas in the local mountains. Those were the days. It was like a little corner of the Sierras about a half hour from Downtown Los Angeles. There are a number of trails leading to the top of Mt. Lowe. If you are interested in the scenic route, begin at the Cobb Estate/Lower Sam Merrill, continue on the Castle Canyon trail to Inspiration Point, then to the Campground and finally the summit. In the alternative, go up Angeles Crest Highway, turn right on Mt. Wilson Road and park your car at Mt. Lowe Saddle 2.1 miles up. This is the way to go if you are not an avid hiker or are with small children. From the saddle, walk through the beautiful CCC Era Stone Tunnel and take the East Trail to the Mt. Lowe summit. It is a suitable trail for children and dogs are permitted. The area used to be home to some nice oaks but since they burned, a bunch of Poodle Dog Brush and chaparral have popped up. The rock formations with the burned trees sticking out and the backdrop of the blue sky and the green meadow below are sublime. Wildflowers with beautiful shades of red are abundant at this time of the year. From the top of Mt. Lowe, there are some nice views of the Los Angeles Basin and Mt. San Antonio and San Gorgonio to the east. You will probably see Raven or Red-Tailed Hawk.

SD Thai Massage (Western and Lemon Grove)

Back in 2008, I noticed some numbness and weakness on one side of my right arm. My doctor at Cedars ordered an MRI which revealed a c6/c7 herniation. He ordered all of these procedures that cost my insurance company tens of thousands of dollars. In addition, the wonderful doctors over at Cedars allowed me to eat all of the Vicodin I could possibly want. It was as if I had a magical, never ending jar of narcotic painkillers in my medicine cabinet. While I appreciate the gesture, I don't think it is a medically sound decision to prescribe a tub full of these oblong yellow pills to people. The doctors at Cedars then convinced me to get a series of epidurals in my spine. This was a major procedure over there, and it even involved general anesthesia, and a bevy of well qualified medical personnel running hither and thither around the procedure room making sure that things were sterile and that all their instruments were in order. While the first one seemed to help quite a bit, the subsequent injections made me irritable, angry and super aggressive. I felt so out of control, that I had to take time off of work while the poison corticosteroids were leached from my body. For a while there, they told me that I was a good candidate for neck surgery, but elective surgery has always made me feel like something was rotten in Denmark. They soon stopped the fool-talk of surgery after Blue Shield of California dropped me like a hot turd and my new insurance, Aetna would not cover said surgery on a cold day in hell. My new insurance company sent me to a new pain specialist over in Koreatown (Anapa Pain Clinic) who talked to me in a more sensible manner, dismissing both surgery and all pain medication during the first consultation at his office. He made a suggestion to get a traction machine ($500), to do some exercises, and get more massages. For the super fucked up days, he told me to use an ice pack. Additionally, he said to resume exercising daily and always keep moving. What great advice! Fast forward to 2012. I still feel some pain and numbness, but the traction machine and the massages are without a doubt the most effective treatments around for me. The massages that I get at this place are exceedingly effective and leave my neck, shoulder and body in general feeling like I don't have an injury at all. There are three different people working here and all of them will have you feeling so great that you won't know whether to laugh or to cry. For sure you will feel much more relaxed all week. Unlike places like Pho Siam where the workers are so lazy, that they won't even use their hands unless you ask them, and tend to press way too hard, this place is a bonafide, professional Thai Massage place. The people here practice Thai Massage the same way that it is taught at Wat Po. They have herbs to add to the massage if you need it at no extra cost. It consists of a lot of stretching, and getting into the meridians of your body to get rid of your pain. Thai Massage is easily a few thousand years old. Western Medicine and Cedar Sinai are much more recent, and much less effective for this type of injury.

Bryan Kest Power Yoga

I recently came here again with my daughter for a class on Tuesday morning. I have gone into a lot of yoga places around town and have really wished that I had half an Oki Dog to put underneath the heater so that the people can sense my lack of approval for their phoniness. They may say namaste, but when you see how they treat the cleaning lady or fight you for a parking space over at Urth Cafe, it is enough to induce projectile vomiting. The people at Bryan Kest power yoga are for real. This is a seriously challenging, hardcore workout taught by people who are serene and willing to share true yoga with you. I am no expert on yogic philosophy and karma, but I don't think that studios that engage in litigation and attempt to assert ownership, dominion and control over yoga poses represent true yoga. While I have taken numerous classes at Bikram College of Indian Yoga including several from the man himself, I think his soul is filled with dog shit. In fact, I have know some people from the Indian Subcontinent and have formulated an opinion on doing business with Indians. They filter everything through the caste system, and if you are dealing with Indians who perceive that they are of a higher caste than you, they will treat you with a great deal of disdain and no respect whatsoever. Make no mistake about it folks, Bikram believes that he is better than you. In my lifetime, I have seen Santa Monica transform from a very compassionate and liberal place into one of the world's most gleaming examples of insidious capitalism. The workout in the class we took was intense. I felt like she encouraged us to utilize our core muscles and gave us a great 90 minute exercise session. I left feeling stretched out and relaxed. Reflecting on the 1970s, I remember the Rent Control Ordinance that was enacted here late in the decade. It is one of my very favorite pieces of legislation ever. It was such a powerful ordinance, that it made large apartment owners in Santa Monica exceedingly nervous and as mad as a hornet. One property owner, local lamprey Lawrence Kates and his partners Harvey and Dave Rosen owned the twin towers apartments on Ocean Ave and rather than being subjected to the ordinance, kept most of the units vacant. It took the property owners decades to water down the once stellar protection offered to renters in Santa Monica. I guess what I am trying to say is that there were a lot of hippies in Santa Monica during the 1970's and early 1980's and there were a lot of progressive thinkers around. People were more compassionate and it seemed like there was more spirit of brotherhood back then. Lots of women dressed in leg warmers and had a big unshaven bush. There were a bunch of Quaaludes and Thai Weed flowing, and to tell you the truth, I wish they would bring back the unshaven bush. A quaalude or two would be spot on too. By requesting a donation after class, Bryan Kest Power Yoga may just be the only remnant of that great era in a sea of soulless places like the Border Grill and Design Within Reach.

Rivas Canyon

The Rivas Canyon Trail stretches from Will Rogers State park to Temescal Gateway Park and is about 2.5 miles long. You catch it just to the left of the sign at the front of the park behind the Ranger's houses. When you get down the first wooden stair case, walk across the parking lot. The trail goes through a shaded oak grove for the first mile. Some of those beautiful trees are at least 200 years old. There are several side trails that are accessible from Rivas Canyon, such as the Temescal Peak Trail that eventually runs into the Backbone Trail about a half a mile from the lone oak tree in Topanga State Park. The Temescal Peak hike loop (about 12 miles) is pretty strenuous, but the Rivas Canyon Trail is easy to moderate and is a nice place to take small children. The views from the Rivas Canyon Trail are fantastic, especially when you get to the top of the brief switchbacks at about the middle of the trail. The Pacific and the entire Santa Monica Bay are visible as well as Temescal and Santa Monica canyons. This trail is a great introduction to the Santa Monica Mountains. The Temescal Peak loop took my wife and I a little over two hours running. The rain started in earnest once we got to the top of Temescal Peak and continued until we finished. The dynamics of the clouds and the rain along with the abundant red, yellow, purple, and blue wildflowers made for an unforgettable run. While the end of the Persian New Year brought more guests to Will Rogers Park than I have ever seen in my life, we only saw four other people on the trail. I was touched that a kind woman took the time to tell us about her New Year celebration and how in happier times she hiked for miles and miles in the mountains surrounding Terhan. Happy Easter. Happy Norwuz. Happy Passover. Happy Trails.

Griffith Park Observatory Hike

You can turn your life around on this trail. You can turn your un-healthy body into a toned, well oiled machine in about a year's time. It only requires that you do this hike five to seven days a week and some modification of your diet. Almost anyone can do it. My wife and I are living proof. Since 4/11, we have lost a total of 60 pounds between us by following this simple program. We had some major motivation to begin after my wife had a tumor removed from her abdomen 1/11 which we attributed to our unhealthy lifestyle. In the beginning, I felt like I was about to die by the time I got up the first hill. By the time I got to the observatory, my body was stinging, and my lungs were heaving up mucus. I had to hit the albuterol inhaler to continue, as sweat poured from my body. By week three, I was feeling better. It helped that I stopped eating most dairy, meat, narcotic painkillers, and processed foods. I also stopped drinking alcohol and began to curtail the large amount of marijuana that I had been smoking on a daily basis for the last fifteen years. I switched to edibles and vastly increased my lung capacity and my capacity to do this hike. Fast. I have found that the feeling I get from regular exercise has solved 85% of my problems. I am only sorry that it took me 45 years to figure it out. Your results may vary, but not by much I suspect. Eventually, I started to seek out other places to hike. I re-discovered all of these wonderful places from my childhood such as Will Rogers, Topanga, Brand Park, Baldy, and San Gorgonio. My brother Paul convinced me to run down the hill on the Sam Merrill Trail in Altadena 2/12. I ran down every hill I hiked up thereafter and then started to run up. I am now running about 60 miles a week and sometimes many more. If you would have told me I would have been trail running 3 years ago, I would have taken another sip of beer and laughed my ass off. Since I began, I have gone out rain or shine, and have missed less than a dozen days. I have missed work more that I ever had in the past because the shittiest day hiking is better than the best day working. I notice several ads for fitness centers this January, and can say with a great deal of happiness that these places have nothing on this beautiful hike. Taking one or two hours to run on this trail will make the other 22 hours in your day run much more smoothly. I can't promise that you will get the same results, but face it, you have nothing to lose by trying. And you can't beat the price.

Will Rogers State Historical Park

This park and adjoining Topanga State Park contain some of the finest scenery in California. Yosemite it is not, but the subtle beauty of the mountains and the animals and plants that live and grow here more than compensate for the lack of landmarks like Half Dome. Your experience will be enhanced if you come here during the week, or are willing to hike a few miles into the back country on one of the fantastic trails contained therein. I would encourage everyone to hike at least as far as Lone Oak to get a sense of what I am talking about. It should take approximately an hour and a half to get there. Part of the trail is shaded. There are tons of hidden, unmarked trails crossing the Backbone Trail to provide you with countless hours of wonder and amusement. If you like birds, you are in for a treat, because this place is a fucking aviary. Seabirds, starlings, hawks, hummingbirds, kites and ravens are abundant. I saw a very large rattlesnake last time I came here, one of the largest I have ever seen. Please observe front and back country guidelines and remove your trash.

Topanga State Park

Topanga State Park encompasses nearly 40 square miles, and is the largest wilderness park inside of a major city. There are dozens of entrances, and to properly explore the Park, one would need at least a full year. I recommend getting a Tom Harrison Topographical Map of the Park if you are truly interested, even though it does not have a comprehensive list of all the trails. The park stretches across the Santa Monica Mountains from the Pacific Ocean, all the way down Sunset Blvd. past Will Rogers State Park and clear up to Encino. There are mountain lion in the park which you will probably never see, but what you will see are a hell of a lot of raptors. Primarily Red Tailed Hawk and White Tailed Kite. Additionally, there are hundreds of pair of beautiful ravens, crows, swifts, and scrub jays. There is a healthy rodent population, and during the summer, you are almost guaranteed a rattlesnake sighting if you go to the right places. Deer abound in the park and are not the slightest bit timid. The chaparral, oaks, wildflowers and other native plants are subtly beautiful during all four seasons. I like Winter the best, because this Park gets pretty hot during the Summer and if you are running long distances, the heat will surely sap your endurance. I recommend accessing Topanga State Park either through the gateway at Will Rogers via the Backbone Trail or from Topanga State Beach. In any event, I am sure you will appreciate the views of the Pacific Ocean, Catalina and Anacapa Islands, the Los Angeles Basin and Mt. San Antonio and San Gorgonio on a clear day. A true five star gem.